It's getting very annoying. I've coughed up blood had chest pains (which is rare for me) been sick in general, aching all over and generally feeling very tired and fed up with everything health wise and life in general.
I am starting to wonder if my body is starting to change??? I mean it's put up with a lot in the last 28 years with the bad leg cystic fibrosis and diabetes.
I feel like I'm getting Sick more often maybe it's just a spell. It doesn't feel like it though.
I'm fed up with feeling like this
So much to do in so little time but I feel like my body isn't wanting to do anything and by trying to push it I may be pissing it off more
I'm still trying to work and get on with things but it's hard when you feel run down and feel like sometimes people don't understand maybe people don't appreciate how I feel inside but that's no ones fault.
I've only been out of hospital 4 weeks and already I have a bad irritable cough. I just don't get it I don't get this sick this quick normally.
It is really pissing me off.
So much so ill or not I decided to go running again and through being sick and pure determination I managed to run a mile in 13 minutes. That might not sound a lot but to me its a step in the right direction and I felt better for it.
I'm going to keep running and pushing but I need to figure out what's wrong with me. I hope by pushing I'm not making things worse but I feel so down and ill and angry that I refuse to sit and take what's coming to me.
I just feel like venting my anger. Do you ever feel like no one gets you? Not because they don't want to but because it's so hard to explain for someone to understand???
I feel like I need time off just a shame cf will never afford me that time.
I know there's always someone worse off but even me being so positive I don't always feel like that.
I'm sorry to moan and whin but I like to use this blog to do so.
I want to get better because recently I felt like I'm not doing enough like I'm lazy but first I need to get better.
What's that famous saying, first you must help yourself before others can help you.
Well actually I want to help myself so I can help others.
In 2014 I want to do three things for charity
Climb mount snowdonia
Jump out of an airplane
Run a half marathon climb run walk or crawl over that finish line.
So I have set myself challenges
Now I just need to get better.
I have always had it in my mind that I won't live much past 30 years of age so time is of the essence.
My body either needs to let me get better or I do my challenges poorly. I'm not stopping
Right now though I need to go away study myself and figure out what's wrong
Then let the challenges begin
